Condemned?

Well, I've been finding myself lately wondering whether or not I'll ever be able to wake up every day at 6.30 and go to school/work... Now let's write a little history... I've never been the healthiest nor the most strong one. I have been a lazy ass all my life, but I have a great sense of responsibility, and lazy as I am, I have absolutely no problem whatsoever in getting up at 3am and go pick up a friend in trouble... I worked for three months at the British Embassy in Havana, and the truth is, not for a single moment did I had trouble for waking up early and going to work. Sure there were days easier than others, and stress had me nuts, but I enjoyed working there, people were great with me, every one was so polite. Now, at my current work, aside from having a racist boss and co-worker that have a love affair and hate my guts, I actually hate what I do. So is it that hard to understand why I have such a hard time waking up and going to work every day?? And my fear is this: not every one can work at the British Embassy and chances have it that I will never work there again probably, so, will I spend all my life unhappy 'cause I can't get up and go to work cause I hate what I do and my boss? Is there a slight chance that someday I will find a place like the British Embassy again and enjoy going to the office? My mom think I'll never achieve something 'cause I can get up in the morning and go to the office, and she thinks if I can't do that now I never will. But I rather think that this is just a phase, and that I hate my boss and my job so much I can get myself to get up early and dress up. I rather think that someday soon i'll have a job i'll enjoy, and won't have to deal with a racist boss who hates my guts and makes my life so miserable!! But that's just me thinking and hoping...
I gotta go now, but it was nice writing for a while, though no one ever reads!
loves,
cL

Hola people!
Well, I did very well in my exams so I might be going soon to the university, which none of you really cares about, but I just wanted to say it.
Don't have anything else to say, so.... And btw thank u so much for all those lovely comments... yeah i'm delussional!
Byes/Chau
cL

lallalalalala

Belief makes things real... makes things feel.. feel alright... believe makes things true, things like you, you and I... Tonight u arrested my mind, when u came to my defense...

Hay canciones que son poesía... Well, I'm sorry for the bilingual crap, but what can I say, Spanish is my mother tongue, and English is my tongue mother...lol that doesn't make any sense does it?? I guess I don't make sense sometimes, but then again, life it self doesn't make sense sometimes... But hey, how boring would it be if it always made perfect sense and we didn't have to worry about trying to find the sense of it...? What the fuck am I talkin about...?? LOL
Ok, I'm gonna go now since i don't seem to be making any sense...
Loves,

What's the message...?

Yeah, well, i'm kinda feeling like for the past two years things have gone... well... shitty. And yeah there's always the classic jerk who tells you to look on the birght side when everything is absolutly fucked up, but... WHERE THE HELL IS THE BRIGHT SIDE???
"Everything happens for a reason..." Another classic, who the heck can actually believe that ppl die for a reason...?
Well, I know i can sound pesimistic but actually i'm not. I'm just angry, mad, depressed, but not pesimistic... pesimistic was two years ago...!!
So, stop it with the encouraging shitty mottos, start by saying something real like hey "what doesn't kill you... hurts like shit but it doesnt kill you" or "if u can't solve it is not a problem, is reality" See? Those are the messages i wanna hear, sarcastic-life-ass-kicking messages!!!
So, de joie de vivre of all those nature-lovers can bite my fat ass... I'm happy, hip hip horay!